And she's whining again.

Sometimes I lie awake in bed at night thinking that I'm not supposed to be here. Just that, 'I'm not supposed to be here', over and over (yes, in English, for which the reason escapes me), and the problem with this is that I have absolutely no idea where I am supposed to be. All I know is that this isn't me, or what I want to do. For a while I felt relieved having a plan B, but lately I've realised that not even mentioned plan B makes me feel 'Yes, this is it'.
Fuck. Is it too much to ask for, wanting to find something that I can feel passionate about? Something to burn for? Something that doesn't involve London, theatre or simply things that holds no future for me?

On a completely different note, I reached a lowpoint this morning when I was tempted by the Abtronic on TV Shop. I'm so ashamed.

From Willy Russell's The Wrong Boy:
"It's terrible, isn't it? When you're into someone as much as you were into Morrisey and then suddenly it's not there; not in the same sort of way, the feeling's gone and no matter how much you want it to come back, it won't."
This? My feelings for We Will Rock You in a nutshell.

This book is sofa king awesome.